Even better than this one!
Two thousand-plus people got up at the crack of dawn to run four and a half miles down Main Street in the blistering heat. Here are four of them:
Here’s one of them being congratulated at the finish line:
Then we all take a shower and go to the parade. Uncle Sam starts things off:
We have bands:
And cute hockey players (did you know there was such a thing as cute hockey players?):
And a guy on stilts:
And a reminder to never forget:
And cute spectators staying hydrated:
And of course our world-famous marching kazoo band:
Don’t you wish you had a world-famous marching kazoo band?
Afterwards it’s time for cute kids to get cool in the back yard before the cookout:
None of this goes on in my little town.
The day began with me and a couple thousand of my friends getting up way too early in to run four miles or so in the rain down Main Street. I have been doing this for years, so it’s a good way of measuring my physical disintegration. This year, maybe because it was cooler, I was actually a couple of minutes faster than last year.
Here I am close to the finish line, going too fast for the photographer to catch up. Notice the way my town paints the center line red, white, and blue for the occasion.
Too fast for the photographer
A couple hours after the race people reassemble on Main Street for the parade. It’s pretty much the same every year.
Here is Uncle Sam, who always leads off the parade:
Here is our world-famous Marching Kazoo Band:
Here’s a tall guy:
Here are guys pretending to be soldiers:
Here are some more guys pretending to be old-time baseball players:
Here are cute kids waiting for people in the parade to throw them candy:
And here is Tom Brady watching some bagpipers. What’s the Fourth of July without bagpipers?
Don’t you wish you lived in my little town?